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Well, more like months but probably years?

Lately though, between a combination of back issues, illness, and other factors, I have emotionally and mentally not been in the best place. Not to mention that I did something I told myself I wouldn’t do again.

For anyone concerned that last thing has nothing to do with physically hurting myself or harming anyone else in any way. It’s just a thing that causes me dismay that I promised myself I would avoid.

Side note/Life Hack: if you can’t get at a good angle to see under something use your video feature with flash on to look. I found my off brand mucinex.

Overthinking things and letting my mind hope and wonder, but also knowing that I’m probably not strong enough to fight against all the things coming at me at once, makes for a harsh internal climate.

And you DO NOT want to know how many times in the last three weeks I’ve wanted to cut off all my hair. Myself. We’re it not for my young child I would be intentionally bald. She likes my hair.

In the last three weeks my back has gone out about three times (really it’s just been the once but it’ll feel better then get bad again). I’ve coughed so much my head hurts and my chest hurts, not to mention the coughing until I gag.

Also and this is slightly more funny than the rest of it, my voice is kinda fine but kinda not, to the extent that my child asked me at one point to stop singing to the music we were listening too, because—and I quote, “it sounds bad.”

I personally found it absolutely hilarious that when I hit the high notes my voice was basically nonexistent. But also the force required to speak is exhausting.

Over the last few days I’ve consumed my weight in ibuprofen and cough medicine. Multiple people at work have told me I smell like a cough drop so at this point it’s probably coming out in my sweat.

But I did finally finish a short story related to the #PretendFantasyNovel. It’s currently up but password protected until the group members have had a chance to read it.

It might end up being available to all in a week. Or I might keep it just between us.

Anyway the melatonin is taking over and I’m gonna let it. Gonna go dream about millipedes on my pillow. Goodnight

Thanks for reading!