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Crash Landing

Category Archives: True Story

Y’all ever wanna go back in time?

26 Sunday Jun 2022

Posted by crashdlanding in Non-Fiction, True Story

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crash landing, crashdlanding, family, memories, non-fiction, past, relive, ride a TRex, time travel

Like, not to the Victorian era, or to ride a T-Rex. But to, say, your teen years? Or college years?

Growing up, we weren’t poor, but we sure as heck were not rich. We did not go hungry, but we bought off-brand. We didn’t have central air or city water. We didn’t take family vacations and our parents didn’t buy us cars when we got our licenses.

I’m the only one in my family to go to college, and I didn’t know that my family (mom, dad, sister—brothers were working) had to do without and struggle to get me through it.

But sometimes I remember my room. I had a (used) queen sized bed all to myself. My room was open to whoever came up the stairs. It stayed hot in the summer and I had a big fan sitting on a table at the foot of my bed to keep cool.

I had a laptop that I got for college (layaway) and a desk I bought with my first paycheck from a job I quit in high school because my grades were dropping. By this time it was basically falling apart from moving it between rooms.

All I had to worry about in the summer was burning up in my room, what story I was gonna work on, and walking quietly past my dad’s room through the kitchen to get to the one bathroom at 1am. He got up at 3:00 to get ready and go to work.

Even further back, my sister and I would quietly clean the kitchen for our mom, who slept on the couch in the living room, because dad was way too warm and the bed hurt her hips. She used to sleep in the recliner. When her dad died I slept in it when she went down to be with her family.

And there was one time when my brother was sleepwalking and looking for a football (he played in middle and high school) and lifted the end of the recliner up. With mom in it.

My first nephew was born the summer before my senior year. I wrote my memoir for my portfolio about him. We were buddies. He’s TWENTY YEARS OLD NOW. he used to come up to my room, when I wanted to be alone and annoy me. But I loved it, really.

I remember recording him saying, “I love you, nanny.” For my mom’s ringtone.

I also remember when my sister’s chihuahua went into labor IN MY BED and her water broke ON MY PRETTY GOLD COMFORTER. We managed to get her downstairs, where she eventually had nine freaking puppies. Yes. She was massive before they were born.

Speedy. Can’t forget Speedy. Yet another “hey mom this dog was in the side of the road and I just couldn’t leave him” situation. My dude was scared of storms and loud noises. But an absolute amazing dog. Always happy to see you.

He’d follow us when we climbed this hills, way back behind the house my grandma, years and years ago, raised a garden. There was also a building, more like a shed, that had chicken boxes. That became our little clubhouse.

One time, my sister, an old family friend, and myself were up there “playing school”. Of course I was the teacher, and I remember being in the middle of saying something, looking up, and staring in the hole of one of the chicken boxes. They looked at me and I just pointed and IT WAS A FREAKING BLACK SNAKE.

I don’t remember if we went back up there after we high tailed it out of there like someone had lit fire under our butts. But I do remember screaming.

Even further back my brother decided to dig a pond. He put a fish in it that he’d caught. But failed to realize that it would dry up without a constant water source. It was beautiful back there. I wonder if that “garden” is grown up now. Are there trees where empty field used to be?

If I could go back in time, just to relive some of those experiences. I don’t know that I’d change a single thing. I don’t know that if want too. Maybe save a life or two. Prevent some broken hearts. Not mine, I didn’t have a broken heart, at least not then. I was often very lonely, a little depressed. But never had my heart broken. That came later in life.

I’d be a different person if my past had been more financially secure. I don’t know if I’d like who I’d be. I kinda like me now. I have my flaws—we all do—but I’m pretty cool with me.

I’m gonna curl up under my 20+ year old quilt my grandmother made. She had to replace the back when I was in college, and she cut off the cigarette burn made by my brother. I would have kept it. History and all.

He’s lucky the patches in it are mostly 70s polyester, or he woulda burned himself and my bed up. He liked my bed better.

Now, time to go to sleep and dream of days gone by.


Thanks for reading.

-c

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The Future of CrashdLanding

25 Friday Feb 2022

Posted by crashdlanding in social media, True Story, Truth

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awareness, crash landing, crashdlanding, facebook, life, mental breakdown, non-fiction, struggle, the future, writing

As I begin once again to travel the darkened path leading me into and through a probable mental breakdown, I can only hope that I traverse the path and come out the other side relatively intact.

I am always struggling. This is all due to a combination of emotional retardation exacerbated by keeping my problems locked away inside my own mind, constant exhaustion, and an insatiable need to be liked by everyone.

This go ‘round the never ending cycle, the triggers were many. Here’s a list of them in no particular order.

  • I paid all my bills out of one check and ended up struggling to have enough money to pay for the continuation of this websites features. But I guess my bills are paid so oh well?
  • Wondering why I’m even paying for the site when I get absolutely nothing back from it. I mean I enjoy doing it but at what cost (roughly $180 a year, actually)?
  • My truck decided to completely stall while idling IN THE PARENT PICKUP LINE. Two other parents got out of their vehicles and pushed me to the side. In reality I realize it was not out of the kindness of their hearts but because of the inconvenience of my dead truck in their way. Now there’s ANOTHER part I need to buy. Again. No money.
  • I made the mistake of looking at education related job opening info at the school my child goes to. And realized very quickly once again that I’ll never be a teacher because it’s been way to long. Also I’m dumb.
  • Two people from my work have been promoted to upper management. This in and of itself is not the problem. The problem is that both of them are-give or take-ten years younger than me. They’ve both worked for the company for less than half the amount of time I have. And through all fault of my own I am still low on the totem pole and I’m still making less that $15 an hour even though I’m getting a raise. Though they will never read this: congrats and good luck to both of them. They’ll make great upper managers, I wish them nothing but the best. We will all miss them at our location.

So why is the title “the future of CrashdLanding”?

In a year, when the payment comes due, for all the thingamajigs related to keeping this site alive, I will very likely save my hard earned money and not renew it.

All I ever wanted with this site, my Facebook page, the group, Instagram BOB HOW MANY SOCIALS DO I HAVE was promoting myself and all the nonsense I do, so that I might make a profit off doing something I love.

I can’t be a teacher because I made the ill-fated decision to take time off, and get any job so my husband didn’t have to keep paying my student loan payment. I’d told myself six months. Six months turned into thirteen years. And I’m basically back where I started.

I loved being in a classroom. I loved teaching, what little I got to do. I am a different person now and I think I’d be better at it now than I would have thirteen years ago.

No one wants to buy the jewelry I make. No one wants my resin products. I did not lose interest in those things I lost hope. Why sit under crouched over a pair of pliers and beads, why break my back and breathe in resin fumes if it’s only going to gather dust on a shelf.

I’m exhausted all the time and I’d have an easier time getting lemon juice from an orange than I have getting fictional words on paper.

All these things are things I love (including this silly little blog in this silly little site). But I’m getting nothing out of it. There’s a lot of time and effort going into this.

So, I’m gonna try and write that pretend fantasy novel. It’ll be available to read, probably chapter by chapter, for a $10 a year subscription. Unless you’re one of the 12 or so people whose names I’ve written down who get free access.

I’m gonna try to write “The Silent Secret” which will also be available via the subscription.

If you’re reading this in March 2023 (and the world as we know it hasn’t ended in WW3) and that subscription is still active and things are posted regularly then I haven’t given up, found a warm cave, and hibernated away from my problems and the world’s chaos.

Right now though, at basically the end of February 2022, I’m super sleepy. So. G’nite.


If you made it this far, as always, thanks for reading.

-c


Don’t get the wrong idea, absolutely ZERO PERCENT of this has anything at all to do with me ending my life.

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Unicorn, Honey Badger, Potato

15 Tuesday Feb 2022

Posted by crashdlanding in Family, Fiction, True Story

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ADHD, anything for The kid really., crash landing, crashdlanding, family, fiction, honey Badger, The Kid, unicorns, writing

And convincing my child to do her homework

So, once or twice a week my kid’s teacher has her students write their numbers. This week it’s 401-500. The Kid struggles with it because “it’s boring”. Also the ADHD doesn’t help. I, however, have discovered ways of distracting her into thinking it’s a game. One such way was telling her I would write a story while she wrote her numbers. And I wanted to see how many she could write before I finished the story.

The random words were: Unicorn, Honey badger, and Potato. This is that story.

Once upon a time, Huey the Honey Badger was looking for dinner. He was running through the forest, his tummy was growling. He stepped in a hole abs rolled down a hill into a part of the forest he has never been in before.

When he picked himself up, he looked around. What he saw could only be described as magical! There was a pond sparking with glittery pink water. The trees were hung with mysterious and delectable looking fruit, and the gentle breeze smelled of cotton candy.

Huey was so hungry he couldn’t decide whether he was dreaming or not. Then from between the blue and yellow trees there stepped a beautiful creature he had never seen before. “Are you all right?” It asked. It was white with rainbow hair and tail, and silvery horn in it’s head.

“I’m okay,” Huey said. “Where am I?” He asked.

“You are in Candyland. I am Ursula the Unicorn.”

Just them Huey’s tum rumbled. “Oh dear,” said Ursula, “you sound hungry! But if you eat anything here you can never leave!” She said.

Huey was sad. He had friends back home.

“Oh wait!” Ursula said. She used her nose to push something toward him. “This plain brown thing is not of this land. Perhaps you can eat it and return again!”

Huey looked at the brown thing. “Oh that’s just a potato!” He said. “I love potatoes!” Huey munched on the potato filling his empty stomach. “That was satisfying, thank you!”

“You’re welcome!” Said Ursula. “If you leave you will be able to return and we can become friends!”

Huey found his way home but promised to return so he and Ursula could become friends. It took many days for him to find the hole he had tripped him, that caused him to fall down the hill into Candyland. But he made sure to take a tasty potato snack when he went!

And Huey the Honey Badger, and Ursula the Unicorn did become best friends!

It worked.

I managed to drag it out for a bit so she could “beat me” and she finished writing the rest of her numbers!

This story is absolutely silly, completely bonkers, and total nonsense. But I kinda love it. If I had more time in my hands and the skill with which to do it, I would illustrate it!

Anyway, that’s my post for today, even if it’s after 10pm and I’m about to doze off! Have a good one, folks!


Thanks for Readinf!

-c

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TBT: That Time I Caught a Bird

20 Thursday Jan 2022

Posted by crashdlanding in Non-Fiction, Throwback Thursday, True Story, Uncategorized

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crash landing, crashdlanding, Disney Princess, fun fact, memories, non-fiction, True Story

Ah. Many moons ago, I wore a yellow vest for my current employer and there was a bird.

I’ve always had a soft spot for birds (except for blue jays they’re jerks). I’ve always wanted a pet bird. If only I had the time.

Several years ago (check the post for when) there was a small bird of I know species (I still don’t know) that managed to make its way inside my place of employment.

It’s been in there so long that it was pretty exhausted. We are technically told not to touch them (germs and all), and they’ll either find their way out or else. Sweethearts we are.

Well this was an interesting experience for me, and it’s something that will remain a positive memory for me. I thought I’d share with you.

You know. Again.

https://crashdlanding.com/2019/06/04/im-a-disney-princess/

Also there was a young hawk in the building once.

Thanks for reading!

-c

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