Tag Archives: BMB

Here’s what’s gonna happen.

13 Saturday Aug 2022

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With… with the website that is.

After Birthday Month Blogs and doing this blogging/writing/chaos thing for 30 days in a row, I feel like I’ve been slacking. I mean, I’ve published exactly two posts since the last day of BMB.

And despite the fact that I now know and understand that I won’t make any money off this blog/website, I still want to be here. So I’m developing a game plan.

Randomized Fiction

My first RF since the end of BMB was a total flop (meaning it’s still sitting unfinished in my drafts), the idea I had for it was *chefs kiss* but the switch in my brain got flipped into long form mode instead of short. I don’t want to bore you with it.

But since it’s not in high demand I’m going to work on it at post at my leisure. Which means I’ll probably put it off until I feel absolutely terrible and rush out some for awful crap BUT I’m gonna try to have it out by next Friday (8/19) when it would have been on Spotify.

That’s not to say it’s not still in my head. It’s there. Oh how it’s there.

BUT Randomized Fiction will still be a thing, at least until I get through all the options on the wheels. Then we will see.

Pretend Fantasy Novel

I’m going to start actively working on it next week. Well maybe Monday (8/15). What that means is posting regular updates (my definition of regular) to the FB page/group and polls. One of the first orders of business is AN ACTUAL TITLE. As with everything PFN related, it will be chosen via polls. All of said polls will be found on FB. Links will be added at the bottom of the page.

Premium Content

While any actual writing done in the PFN will be shared with the twelve main contributors to the FB Group, it will be available for wider release for sure in book and kindle book form.

But I plan on choosing one other long term project to focus on, in addition to PFN. This project will be shared chapter by chapter solely as premium content. This means that there will be pay wall where someone who wants to read the story gives me money and they are granted access.

This will not be like PFN in that a select few get the story for free. Since it will not be a community project, I don’t have that “they helped write it, they deserve early access” thing. It will, however, eventually be self-published, like PFN.

The title that I’ll be starting will be determined by…

Guess.

No go on. Guess!

YOU GUESSED IT!

As will ALL of my polls they’ll take place on my Facebook page.

I will first write up individual proposals for each story. I’ll ask the group to read them and after they’ve all been shared, I’ll post the poll. There will be at least three proposals, perhaps more.

The Pretend Fantasy Novel, the Mystery Project, and Randomized Fiction will be my only fictional projects until further notice. Unless I have some random inspiration and write my little heart out.

Other Content

I’m going to try do so more “weird news” content, like GIANT AFRICAN LAND SNAILS. I really get a kick out of those. And general nonsense. Also, I’d like to do another “You Don’t Need…” I’m thinking of turning that series into podcasts episodes as well.

All Randomized Fiction will be available for listening on Spotify. Were I wealthier and could justify spending the money, I’d make them available on Apple Podcasts as well. But right now I talked myself out of a $22 sweater at Walmart cause I accidentally double paid my one of my credit card payments. So, like. Broke.

Anywho, that’s the rough draft of the plan right now. I’ll keep ya updated. Check the socials below for more accurate weather forecasts. Wait.

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BMB: The Finale

31 Sunday Jul 2022

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Day 31: The Last Day

Recap

I’ve spent the last 30 days writing and posting a blog every single day. Okay some days were cheating. I’m sorry, no body is perfect. I’ve stayed up late nights finishing posts, I’ve carried posts into the next day and still posted for the day. I’ve learned a lot

What I’ve Learned

I’ve learned that doing this (gestures to the blog) daily is a full time job. If you want do do something like this, having a whole other full time job is not going to make it easy.

I’ve lost more sleep, literally, over this month. Simply because I’ve stayed up late on work nights to get a post done before midnight. I’ve fallen asleep in front of my computer.

But man I had fun.

I’ve also learned that no matter how you post or what you post, it’s still not going to make people read. Especially people who know you.

es to the blog) daily is a full-time job. If you want to do something like this, having a whole other full-time job is not going to make it easy.

I’ve lost more sleep, literally, over this month. Simply because I’ve stayed up late on work nights to get a post done before midnight. I’ve fallen asleep in front of my computer. Oh, and also, last night I had my first dream about blogging.

But man I had fun.

I’ve also learned that no matter how you post or what you post, it’s still not going to make people read. Especially people who know you.

Top Posts of the Month

Excluding this one, of course. Let’s see which posts did the best, and try to figure out why.

  • I’m Doing It Again: July 16: 45 Views, 18 Visitors. This post was about how i was beginning to dream about being a teacher again.
  • Album Review: “The Wiser Moon” – Ap Harbor: July 27: 24 Views, 24 Visitors. This post was an album review for a friend’s band’s album. I’m sure it did as well as it did because of the connection to him and his band.
  • The Things I Use: July 29 Views, 13 Visitors: A poorly and quickly written list of items I use in my “business”.
  • I’m Doing a Terrible Job: July 5th: 25 Views, 15 Visitors. Literally about not doing well at this nonsense. lol

I have zero legitimate explanation for why these particular posts preformed the way they did. The posts that were fiction, and the posts that I put more effort into, like “Giant African Land Snails” were all on the mid to low range of views.

My highest performing post of all time is one from March. It’s about how I forgot to cancel a yearly subscription to a weight loss/meal tracking app. I get notifications almost daily about new likes. Yet I cannot seem to get view information.

Worth it?

I’m guessing I won’t know if I’ve earned any extra ad revenue from the full Birthday Month of Blogs, until tomorrow or later, as it seems to post that info for the month. So, financially, probably not.

But any any other way? I supposed “consistent” posting might have helped me get new followers, but all of the posts from the month and historically are fairly all over the place and no cohesion. I cannot seem to stick to one type of blog!

What Would I Do Differently?

I have no plans for doing this again anytime soon, but if it turns out I’ve made some change off of it I might try again. But if I did there are several things, I’d do different.

First off, I would preplan and possibly prewrite all my posts. Including any extras, I might want to make for them, book covers, videos, images, etc. This would save me time and worry. I’d know what I wanted to do and when I wanted to do it.

I would also be more consistent, with posting and with content and promotion. I have several different social media accounts that I use strictly for sharing blog posts and related things. I would better utilize these outlets to promote the posts.

Finding a way to do this and not add more stress to my already enormous pile of stress trash, would be key to convincing me to try this again.

What’s Next?

First off, I’m going to take a small vacation from posting here. If something comes to mind and I want to share it here, I will. But other than that, at least for a week, expect good old inconsistent Crystal to return.

After that, I do plan on making “Randomized Fiction” a permeant fixture. Even if I only gave myself about 24 hours to write and post it, I had fun doing it. This time, though, I’ll “spin the wheels” a week in advance and work on it and post a week later. I will be posting all of these and other posts to the podcast, as well.

I’ll also be adding a page (these are linked at the very top of the website) dedicated strictly to “Pretend Fantasy Novel” details. There will be a thorough recaps and updates to progress, which I will return to regularly working on soon.

There will be more coming soon, but right now, I’m ready to catch some zzzzz…..

BMB: The Plan

24 Sunday Jul 2022

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Day 24: In which I grasp at straws for what to post today.

The Plan for the rest of BMB

  • Day 25: Pretend Fantasy Novel: The Prophecy (I will be sharing the prophecy that will be part of the Pretend Fantasy Novel. If you want to know more about that, check out this old not-to-date-post).
  • Day 26: Education Adjacent: Jean Piaget
  • Day 27: “The Wiser Moon” – AP Harbor Album Review.
  • Day 28: “YouTuber’s My Kid Watches: LogDotZip
  • Day 29: “Randomized Fiction” Gonna spin some wheels again, baby! (Last Randomized Fiction)
  • Day 30: (open)
  • Day 31: (open but might throw a party lol)

Things I’m thinking I’ll Make permanent features

Randomized Fiction: I’ll keep this one around, maybe. I think it’s fun and interesting. I might, like do it more than a day or two in advance. But we all know how I roll.

“Youtubers My Kid Watches“: Mostly because The Kid watches A LOT of YouTube. And because I already have the next one in mind.

Education Adjacent: Just because I have been thinking about doing a similar concept for a while now, and think it’ll be interesting to revisit my college days. Don’t go that far, I was a boring college kid.

Possible Other Ideas

  • Crystal’s Dumb Ideas: I have at least one draft post on this topic, and I have had a LOT of dumb ideas. Of course, my financial advisor and business partner, as well as my general council (by this I mean my husband, he is all those things) has on every occasion advised me NOT to do these things.
  • Fiction Friday: By no means a new concept, but one I’d like to implement. Since I am trying my best to get as much use out of this website as possible until I have to decide whether or not to renew. Financially it’s not looking good. FF will include Randomized Fiction posts, among others. Some audience participation might be involved. That would happen with the help of my facebook group, CrashdLanding Site.
  • Crystal Tries: Okay technically this will fall under the “dumb ideas” heading but its something I’ve thought about for a while and has great potential. But doesn’t everything?

In Conclusion

I’m sure anyone who has been consistently reading this blog has noticed that most of the time I am LITERALLY WINGING IT with all these posts. That is the only thing that is consistent about me is the fact that I’m winging it. Like with life. I’m not sure what the goal has been with this whole thing, but maybe I’ll figure it out in a week.

PS Do y’all like this image better or, like, me just typing out my closing? I know you won’t let me know but I wanted to ask.

BMB: Draft Day: “Things I’ve Always Wanted to Do… but probably never will”

22 Friday Jul 2022

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Day 22: In which I take a draft post and make it publishable.

This post was last saved on August 11, 2016. I never finished it for whatever reason (mostly because I don’t finish things). But with some addendums and notes!

  1. Run a marathon (I’d probably have a heart attack)
  2. Get a tattoo (not brave enough to face the pain lol)
  3. Dye my hair purple (money and maintenance) – I have done this twice in two different ways. A few months before my mom died, I had my hair professionally bleached and had purple added in. More recently, meaning about two or three years ago, I purchased semi-permanent dye and “purpled” it.
  4. Visit a foreign country (need my passport)
  5. Go on a safari (goes with #4)
  6. Own a business (but like, what?)
  7. Go sailing (I can’t even swim): I HAVE ridden on a ferry to reach the lighthouse were we spread my mom’s ashes. It was a fun ride, but I’m not marking this one off yet!
  8. Have something I’ve written be really popular! (I’m not that good!) – define popular? Every once in a while, Black Friday: A Zombie Story pops back up.

And now for some additions.

  1. See the Aurora Borealis in person
  2. Touch an elephant. I know that wild animals should be left alone and not have unnecessary human interaction. Doesn’t mean I can’t want to. Just means I won’t.
  3. Learn to play an instrument. I own a ukulele. I don’t try. Maybe a series on the blog?
  4. Go on a cruise. Not to be confused with sailing, as above.
  5. Ride a horse. I have been bitten by a horse (apparently, he liked the smell of cigarette smoke–which wasn’t mine).
  6. See Pink live in concert.
  7. Make money doing something I love. Not just, “here’s five bucks for that pair of earrings” but “You can quit retail now, because you’re a writer!”

I used to talk to myself a lot about having pipe dreams. You know, dreams that aren’t worth anything but sending down a pipe. I know a lot of things I want to do are unattainable for someone like me. But a dream is something you have to distract you from the nonsense that surrounds you. And never let someone tell you not to dream. You do you, dude.

BMB: Pretend Fantasy Novel Updates

20 Wednesday Jul 2022

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Day 20: in which there really aren’t many updates

As I’ve said, I think about it on the daily.

Oh a daily basis, I am thinking about the story. And many different aspects related to the story. But between my many obligations, real and manifested, I don’t have a lot of opportunities to work on it.

After BMB is over I plan on attempting to work on it more. I need to come up with a title, and well, I need to write the stupid thing.

Now, many moons ago, I could write on something without having all the details at once. I could just put pen to paper or finger to keys and go at it. But now, with the invention of sharing it with others I think I have created for myself accountability that leads to failure.

Before, I could write and not expect anyone to read it. Before, I could shove it into a corner for a few months and return to it when I wanted to. Now, however, I struggle with giving myself deadlines. I think that people expect me to get it done and do an amazing job.

When this month is over

And I don’t have this whole month of blogs to worry myself over, I am taking a sabbatical of all social media, including tick tacks, and I am just going to write. I have 9,000 ideas in my head and they need to be put down somewhere.

But, I mean, don’t, like, get your hopes up. We all know how I am!

BMB: The Bug Catcher (fiction)

17 Sunday Jul 2022

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Day 17. More random generator fiction

The Process First

My complicated and delicate process.

So there I was. Minding my own business. It was warm, the sun was out, a beautiful day. The best days are sunny days, to be honest. I was sitting on this blade of grass when I heard something. Well, felt it really. The ground beneath me shook. I thought maybe I should run away.

But I didn’t, the sun was just right in this spot, and I knew there was something just tasty nearby. But then the noise got bigger. And closer. Then the sun suddenly disappeared from above me. I could see it, way over, still shining on the grass. but above me, it was gone.

So, reluctantly I turn around and look.

There was this enormous thing standing over me. It had four legs but only stood on two. It held things and it stared down at me.

I froze in my spot, like the had gone to bed for the season, and I should have gone to bed, but it wasn’t time for the sun to go to bed. And this thing stood over me.

Then I heard some nonsense. I think it was something communicating with the thing that stood over me, it wasn’t a sound I recognized. It was different.

(Come back here, Todd! It had said. How do his legs move faster than mine he’s smaller!)

That’s when I moved. I leaped a great leap and then another. But the thing with its giant legs came after me, big things are faster I learned that. So I leaped again and again. And I heard another noise.

(Giggling. Todd was giggling.)

I turned to look, because I was back in the sun again, surely I was safe now. But no, the humongous thing was there, and the thing at the end of one of its legs, it came down fast. I was caught in the thing it held.

(Todd, have you caught something? Please don’t be another spider. I hate spiders.)

The thing I was caught under lifted, just a little, and I tried to leap away again, but it was useless. It had me for good.

(Oh, it’s a grasshopper. He’s a small one too. Ok, I guess you can keep him for a bit. Need help with the bucket?)

Then I saw the other thing, it was much bigger.

(Here, scoop him up. Now dump him in. That’s right. The lid, put it on so he can’t get away. Good job! Now you can look at him!)

I was in something, but I couldn’t see it. It had a top and a bottom, and I could see everything around me, but when I tried to leap, I hit something I couldn’t see. Then in front of me was the thing that got me. It stared at me.

(Todd giggles. Yep, see his legs? He can jump very high with those! And see the black dots! His eyes, yeah!)

I tried to jump more, but new it was pointless. I was stuck. Going nowhere fast. And it was hot and still in here. I missed the sun, I missed the grass. I missed the air. The pleasant grass. The safe grass where giant things did not chase me.

(Yeah, he’s cool, right? Yep. Okay, we should let him go now. No, we can’t keep him! You wouldn’t like living in a bucket, would you? Right. Let’s open it up.)

Then, suddenly, there was more air and the sun came through the top! Freedom, I needed to make my escape! I leapt toward the sun and the air!

(Oop. He’s ready to go! Did you see that?)

The things’ noises got smaller and further. and finally I was back on my grass! The air was blowing and I was safe! The sun was shining. I will remember the ordeal always. Oh, but now I’m hungry.

BMB: Randomized Fiction Announcement

13 Wednesday Jul 2022

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Day 13? Yes. 13.

What is Randomized Fiction?

Made with Canva Video leap and the tick tacks

Randomized fiction is me wanting to write something fictional but being too lazy to do the work myself.

As explained in the very poorly done video (I hate the sound of my own voice), I used a random word generator to choose six nouns to pair with the six words chosen by members of the CrashdLanding Site group on Facebook, and added them to a wheel app that I downloaded to my phone. I spun the wheel to choose the words.

If we’re being technical the “siblings” one was a bit more specific at first. Also I edited out the names of the people who added them for privacy reasons.

Expect it for Fiction Friday. If it’s not posted before midnight Friday call me on it.

Seriously, I put things off for multiple reasons but mostly cause of exhaustion and fear I’d not good enough. I really see some potential in this.

If I continue with the wheels I have, I’ll remove already used options, maybe. Probably. I don’t know. The melatonin is hitting.

Thanks for Reading!

-c

BMB I turn 37 (again) tomorrow

10 Sunday Jul 2022

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Day 10

I just spend half an hour watching my nephew’s tick tack Live

He was playing guitar. I didn’t realize how good he’d gotten. He now says he will learn “The Boxer” by Simon and Garfunkel. It was one of my Mom’s favorites. I’m sure he could learn it quite quickly.

Watching him makes me want to bring out the ukulele I bought like four years ago and try to learn something on it. But I’m old and my hands hurt. And where even is the thing?

Today we celebrated my birthday

The Hubs had been asking me all week where I wanted to eat for my birthday and I could never think of anything. He said if I didn’t come up with something he’d surprise me.

We ended up at a local restaurant called Cloud 9. It was delicious, and I even got desert.

Honestly be best part was spending time with him and The Kid. They are the best part of my life.

Also I didn’t have to work.

Hey did you know that it would take $25,000 to pay off my debt? Yeah, I can thank that free credit monitoring from Capital One for keeping me posted on that.

Tomorrow is my actual birthday

I have had a few very tiny moments where I kinda felt guilty for not being on Facebook. My personal account is still active and several people (who hadn’t communicated with me but once a year anyway) will wish me happy birthday there. Even though I’ve been off Facebook for, like, 210 days. But most of them pay zero attention to me anyway, so it’s their bad if I do not respond to their birthday wishes.

Current working theory is I have a spider bite.

Exhibit A: “Stanky Leg”

The black dots/dashes are me tracking the redness size. It is warm to the touch—noticeably different from the rest of my leg. It’s tender and sensitive. And it itches like HELL.

Like, go insane from the itching, filet-o-flesh to stop it, bonkers itchy. And this happened A WEEK AGO. I’m pretty sure it got bigger overnight, although I didn’t notice it this big this morning.

I did peroxide the open wounds hoping to perhaps eat away the flesh so I could either not itch anymore or lose the leg. I will neither confirm nor deny whether I hoped my leg would rot away so I’d never have to work again.

Anyway, I applied some antibiotic ointment to the holes—they’re not really open but they’re not actively bleeding either—and a bandage. But that was driving me crazy too. I take Benadryl every 8 or so hours and try to keep it propped up.

My big old fat legs tend to swell and my running theory is any type of trauma or injury to them heals slower because of that poor circulation.

Perhaps I’ll wake in the morning and my leg will have rotted off. At least it won’t itch anymore!

Tomorrow I’ll post (hopefully before noon), a video explaining how my next bit of fiction is happening.

Thanks for reading!

-c

BMB: I Was Going to Call In Today

09 Saturday Jul 2022

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Day, like 8? Nine? Day 9.

I was gonna call in.

Not because I’m sick or someone else is sick. Or because of some family obligation. But because I just needed some time off.

But I didn’t. As I’d told one of my bosses, I’m a glutton for punishment. You see, two days ago I was an hour and a half late getting off (OT paying my bills this week woo). This wasn’t because I was forced too. I just didn’t want to (a) leave something half finished and (b) didn’t want to leave it on my teammate. As I was leaving I told manager A and my teammate, “shoo I might not be here tomorrow.” I was being absolutely not serious and they knew it.

So the next day, when A told me, laughing, “Thanks for showing up!” We both laughed a little. Little did he know I had texted my husband a few hours earlier saying, “I might call in tomorrow.”

There are a few reasons why. These include but aren’t limited to the fact that I’m so exhausted that I napped on lunch (undisturbed), I’m burned out, and I could use some quality family time.

Also a factor in me wanting to call in: the fact that the two days afterward I was already off. So I’d have three days in a row.

So why didn’t you?

It was the fact that I am a glutton for punishment, and the inescapable guilt I always feel when calling in, regardless of the reason. Honestly the last time I remember not feeling even a small amount of guilt for calling in was when my mother was dying. To be honest, I couldn’t remember to even call in some of those days, much less have room for guilt related to it.

So, despite the fact that I’d already started to get excited about starting my tiny vacation a day early, when my husband asked me when I came home, “So are you going to call in?”

My response was, of course: “Probably not.”

I begrudgingly went in to work, despite the absolute desire not to, like a good little employee. And I did legit tell manager B that I wanted to but figured I better not.

The fact, too, that my child needs dental work and I want to be able to be there for her, well, I need my options open with time.

All The Regerts

However, it didn’t take long for me to regret showing up. It never does, sadly. Before the two hour mark, I was down in the floor, fixing a vendor mistake, as is often the case, on my knees. I made the terrible mistake of turning without moving my knees.

“Oh well, that’s not good.” Are the words i verbalized when I felt the telltale Twinge. I cannot explain why but the only thing I can think of when I get The Twinge is a salt grinder.

The Twinge usually happens with some bending or twisting motion. It’s a tingly, faintly painful, feeling. Sorta like when your foot was, like, dead asleep, and it’s coming back and there’s these pins and needles? But like, all at once. It lasts a few seconds and then it’s gone. But what’s left behind is pain with movement.

This time, as opposed to last, it’s more in the middle of my back, instead of the lower back. My absolute best guess is muscle related, because otherwise how the hell am I still walking?!

If after all these years and all these Twinges, if this is not a muscle but a spinal related issue (since it’s my back), how does my lower half still function?

Bad Luck, Bad Karma, or Fate?

Now, whose to say, had I called in, I’d not moved in a funny way, and not had the same or similar issue? I don’t know if I believe in fate, but I’m pretty sure I believe in bad karma for me.

Because of course I was thinking of taking a mental health day for myself, and end up with a sore back while at work. Luckily, though, it wasn’t much worse. I feel like my middle back has less movement. It’s more, stable? My lower back, I bend a lot. I was able to function today without altering my movements too drastically.

I’m gonna be 37 (again) in two days.

I’m not gonna let this put a damper on my two whole days off. I’m gonna sleep in (8:30? 9:00?! Scandalous! OUTRAGEOUS!). I’m going to spend quality time with The Hubs and The Kid.

But right now, my melatonin (which I don’t usually take if I’m not working the next day), and the Benadryl (which I took to combat this bug bite) are currently fighting to see who gets to punch me in the brain. Time for sleeps.

Thanks for reading!

-c

BMB: Caffeine is a drug

07 Thursday Jul 2022

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Day 7

Despite the fact that I spent the first half of my day in a terrible mood, as always, and I was about an hour and a half late going home today, I came home in a great mood.

I am still in a great mood.

Why?

Because I am in drugs. No not the clinically prescribed drugs one would take that would improve their mood, no.

No, I’m blaming the caffeine.

See, despite the fact that I am 100% not supposed to have caffeine, not even in chocolate (which, by the way, rude), I have it. I have too much of it. I don’t drink coffee regularly no. My vice is pop. Or soda if you will. But I won’t.

Pepsi mostly, but I do enjoy other fine caffeinated beverages, except energy drinks. But today, instead of Pepsi, I hit the hard stuff.

Yep.

Ah yes. 91mg of caffeine in a 20oz bottle.

In comparison, a can of Pepsi, my drug of choice when I have cash, has about 24-27mg of caffeine. A 20oz bottle has 63. (1)

Did you know that caffeine is a stimulant? it is also the world’s most widely used psychoactive drug. Wild.

Also, they tell you to limit your caffeine while pregnant but if you have a premature infant (like my now 13 year old nephew) they give them caffeine to improve lung function and prevent breathing problems. (2)

I once had a doctor tell me (I’m still mad at that ENTIRE experience) that caffeine was one of the hardest to kick habits.

But let me tell you, I always notice a significant difference in myself if I have gone most of the day without it. I drank just half that bottle of Code Red Mountain Dew on lunch, and an hour and a half later I finished it. Within an hour of my list “hit” I was feeling better.

It’s likely that because of my inconsistent use of caffeine that it has this effect. It would most likely lose its effectiveness if I stuck with the same amount every day.

But by George my heart does seem to go absolutely bonkers sometimes, when I drink it. But then sometimes it doesn’t.

I think I’ll do more research on caffeine. I’m not good at all the chemical or biological names, like “methylxanthine class” and “adenosine” and “acetylcholine”. But I wouldn’t be mad at the Wiki-Rabbit Hole.

Thanks for reading.

-c