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Tag Archives: broke

Things I would do if I were rich

04 Sunday Dec 2022

Posted by crashdlanding in Non-Fiction

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Tags

bonkers, broke, challenge, crash landing, crashdlanding, drawing, life, links, money, non-fiction, stickers, writing

While I have recently written a post about how having too much money makes a person lose their grip on reality, it seems I am in a constant state of not having enough money. So logically the only thing I can think of is all the things I would do if I had enough money to not have to worry about not having enough money. So, a list. This list shall include what I would do if I suddenly had money and what I would do with said money over time.

  • I would first pay off all of my debt. This is currently about $22,000
  • I would buy my husband and I new cars. Within reason, of course. I wouldn’t drop a bunch on a new Lambo for him or anything.
  • I would pay off the house. We’ve lived in it for thirteen years now, and he’s paid the payment. I don’t know how much said payment is, and I don’t know how much we still owe. But I would 1000% take care of that nonsense.
  • I would obviously take care of the necessary repairs on the thing. I need a new roof, if I’ve not mentioned that.
  • I would set aside money for my child in a savings account. This would be used for whatever she needed it for in the future.
  • I would start a small business.
    • This has been a pipe dream of mine for some time. I would either buy a building or a piece of property and build a building for this small business.
    • It would be a place for me to make and sell jewelry, resin and clay crafts, and other things I’ve wanted to do over the years.
    • I would also have my own private office space where I could work and write and all the things I don’t get to do in this universe.
    • I’ve also imagined owning a large building, like an old grocery store, and dividing it up into workspaces for people to rent out. They could make their craft or preform their service and there would be a storefront where everyone could sell their products. There would also be a coffee shop and baked goods and sandwiches. And maybe a book nook/bookstore.
  • There would be a significant portion of my money that I mysteriously came into possession of donated to charity, either by way of an already established one or one I created on my own.

Now, don’t look at me and say, “Crystal, dreams come true if you just work hard and—“

Shoosh, just shoosh. I don’t care what we were told growing up and what I now realize I have told my child on multiple occasions. It takes way more than working hard to make dreams come true. Dedication, willpower, energy, and there is one other thing I can’t remember… OH WAIT MONEY. I have $17 in my bank account right now.

And to be perfectly honest with you, I am only here right now, writing this post because I told myself, “No, Crystal. Regardless of whether anyone reads this blog or not, seeing how many days in a row you could post is a personal challenge, not a challenge set and monitored by anyone else. You are going to make a post even if you have to sound absolutely bonkers doing it.”

Plus, I really like seeing that little notification pop up telling me what day of the streak I am on (this should be day seventeen, ironically). I’m probably going to take a screenshot of it and add it to the post, post posting. Wait.

Anywho, I am a long way off before I beat my record. I think, there were some Glitches with Birthday Month Blogs and it didn’t pick them all up right. That was 31 posts.

I have no idea what’s coming in the next few posts, I didn’t know what has going on with this one. Until I realized that if I closed my eyes for too long, I would fall asleep. I’ve only blinked like three times the entirety of this post.

If you’ve stuck around through this entire post, I salute you. If you’ve read a single one of my posts in, well, ever, Fist bump yourself for me. I appreciate it. My husband doesn’t even read them.

Goodnight.

Oh wait don’t leave yet!

If you observed The Drawing Challenge Post, my niece chose a duck. She’s the only one who comments on my youtube.

Also, eventually I’m gonna make a sticker out of the sunflower. I post about that soon too.

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Yes I’m back back again

28 Monday Nov 2022

Posted by crashdlanding in Non-Fiction

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

ads, broke, crash landing, crashdlanding, non-fiction, push me off a cliff, revenue, stats, vocal

So you can share in yet another downward spiral

Because I am a glutton for punishment, I’m here for day… whatever… of seeing how many days in a row I can manage to post. Let’s review shall we?

  • 12 Posts in a row (including this one)
  • Most Views: 11 (On Grief)
  • Most Likes: 5 (A Post From JULY)
  • Yesterday’s Post Received 3 whole likes on Facebook. Absolutely no interest in anything else. One of those likes came from someone who didn’t even read it.
  • ZERO fiction posts

Downward Spiral

Once all my bills come out there will be a total of $3 in my bank account.

I still have ten days until payday. And even payday will be questionable because of bills. And I’ll have to set aside money for my kid’s birthday trip to the ice cream shop. Anyone wanna buy my kidney. I’ll give you a discount and make the ice to leave me in the bathtub.

You’ll probably wanna take the left one. Not sure the right one is good shape. But that pain could be something else.

Don’t worry, darlin’

There will be a list of people who will only know that I’ve not allowed myself to slip into the never ending void because links to new blog posts are automatically shared to my Facebook page. And I don’t have any scheduled.

No, despite the fact that I contemplated just driving off the side of the road and into the river with my Dodge Ram, I don’t plan on pulling the plug on the dumpster fire of my life quite yet.

But don’t worry, I will try to stop posting about my personal struggles for a while. Hopefully only fiction for the next few days. Not that anyone would read it.

Hey just for craps and giggles let’s see if I’ve made anything off Vocal.

hahahaHahahaHAHAHHA the $5.00 was some kind of bonus for something. 8 cents is from actual reads. And I can’t withdraw until I make, like, $25.

Well that’s depressing. I guess it would help if I had more stories there. But for some reason I have 1 whole subscriber. Well, should be called a follower. They don’t pay for my stories. Here’s the LINK if you care. Everything there is here anyway.

That’s still a LOT better than I make off of ads on this blog.

This is all time. And I can’t get that until I make $100. So never basically.

Anyway, I’m wasting my time. Oh well, I’m not worth anything else. I’m worth almost $15 an hour at my day job but I’m replaceable so.

I promise I’ll try to have some escapism fiction for tomorrows post. I need a little unreality in my life right now.

Goodnight.


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Hello and welcome again to Depressed Crystal

29 Saturday Oct 2022

Posted by crashdlanding in My Life is a Dumpster Fire, Non-Fiction

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Tags

broke, bucket, call me a witch and drop a house on me I’m done, crash landing, crashdlanding, depressed, depression, friendships, gravity, I need a new roof, money, Newton, non-fiction, parenthood, relationships

I’m your host, Lobotomeee.

I recently took an 8 day vacation from work. When I came back from it I was feeling much better emotionally. However, things are starting to building up like a digestive tract that hasn’t gotten enough fiber.

Sorry.

The Ship Maybe Be Sinking

First off, I’ve known for a while that I’m not the kind of friend to some that means I’m on the list of “hey she should know about this”. In fact I’m not on that list of many people in my life. I tend to learn things about people secondhand.

I’ve know this information for a long time, and I’ve decided to not force the issue so as not to bother or annoy anyone, I have also decided I’m not going to dip my toes into a wading pool I’m not invited too. These decisions are made for my mental health so I do not linger where my presence is not requested.

This was all a conscious decision and of my own freewill. But I’d be gosh darned if it doesn’t still hurt a little.

I’m 100% sure that I’m likely just as “at fault” in relationship maintenance as others. The same way that it takes two to tango, it takes two people willing an able to make a bond strong.

I have lost a number of friends in my day, and I’ve had all manner of reactions to it. But no matter how it happens, whether they’ve just disappeared or we’ve drifted apart, I still mourn almost as if there were a death. But the death of what one thought was mutual still stings.

Raising The Kid

After ten months of struggle, and thinking I’d finally reached a plateau, we’re back where we started, basically.

In December of 2021 the hubs and I made the decision that it was time the Kid started sleeping in her own bed. For basically all of her life, she has slept in the bed with me. Now I don’t want to discredit my husband and baby daddy, there were a few nights he took over. But his batting percentage is significantly lower than mine.

The decision was mostly prompted by repeated issues at school resulting in discipline being required. And when you have to punish a kid, allowing said kid to sleep in bed with her mom every night seems a little counterproductive. We made it clear to her that she wasn’t being pushed out because I didn’t want her, she was being guided gently to her own space because it was time to grow up.

Also she’s getting big and a full size bed doesn’t have enough space for the both of us.

She was doing really well. I was doing really well with taking her back to her room at night when she’d wake up. But vacation changed the tune. Because I didn’t have to work every day, I wasn’t making her stay in her room.

So when vacation was over, I couldn’t bring myself to crawl out of bed in the middle of the night and make her go to her room, lay with her until she fell asleep and trudge back to my room. It’s just easier and I get more sleep than all that. Except the rare and glorious occasions when she SLEPT IN HER BED ALL NIGHT.

She hasn’t done that more than a handful of times since my vacation. Waking up this morning after sharing my bed with her for about four hours last night, my hips and joints and head were hurting. I spent most of that time laying in one uncomfortable position to accommodate her and her need to be physically touching (or often on top of) me. Wanting her to sleep in her own bed all night so I could sleep alone makes me feel like a bad mom.

But my lack of willpower to refuse her when she comes stumbling into my room in the middle of the night when I’m drowsy in my own bed makes me feel like a bad mom too. I can’t win for losing.

The Roof The Roof is leaking and it’s becoming a problem.

I’m not even entirely sure at this point how long there has been a leak in the ceiling over my bed. We have lived in this house for thirteen years. There are at least two leaks in the roof over the living room and one over my bed.

Well, it turns out there is one long leak.

Water, while it has no mind of its own, will follow the path of least resistance. That trait, combined with the force of gravity telling it what to do, leads it to create a path of destruction. While your first thought of water might be of something gentle and flowing, water, given enough of it, can begat floods.

While I’ve not had my life flipped over by a flood, I do have the slow and gentle destruction of my sanity by a small leak in the form of a drip, just over my bed. Where my head lays.

I can’t remember when I first started noticing it, but it’s been a problem for a while now.

You see, my whole house, floor to ceiling is wood of some form. The walls and ceiling are the same material, wood slats. And in this wood, like can be found in most wood, are knots. And my leak seeps slowly through a knot.

It’s Knot your problem it’s my problem. That big brown dot turns kinda white when it’s not leaking. It’s been raining. Yay me.

Now, I don’t know why I assumed that it was just dripping straight down onto that knot. And not the actual truth. That the water leaking through the roof has to build up and likely form a puddle for it to leak through.

Because just the other morning, after staying up all night making my kid a costume for Halloween I noticed a wet spot at the foot of my bed. On the bed. At first I thought, oh, I might have laid a wipe there, since I was using them to clean brushes.

After The husband and Kid left for school, I looked into it. Nay, it was not a wipe. In fact it was another drip. The water from the leak in the roof, wherever it is, had built up, and was now slipping through the joints in the slats of wood. It found the quickest and easiest way through and was dripping at the foot of my bed.

I followed the seam of the wood all the way down and it’s right in line with the leak at the head of my bed.

Yay me

Now, I had previously manufactured a temporary solution to having a drip of water on my face every night. It’s what I like to call a hillbilly MacGyver situation. Dollar tree edition. But while temporary meant “until we’re able to fix it”, it decided it was done with my nonsense early this morning.

Now, not only is my pride hurt and I have a red mark and a lump on my forehead, but I had myself a good old fashioned mental breakdown. I cried in bed not just because it hurt, not just because I got slapped awake with a bucket to my noggin, but because eventually this leak is gonna get worse and I’m going to be covered by what’s used to be the upper part of my house.

Ow

Dangerous Combination

Combine all of the above with a constant feeling of failure, feelings of inadequacy, of uselessness. If being broke and depressed, and I am weaving a dangerous web with what the universe keeps throwing at me.

There are an alarming amount of people that would taking having a bucket dropped on your head as a sign. Gravity, after all, was discovered when Newton got sacked on the head by an apple.

But Newton didn’t put the apple on the tree waiting for it to fall. I stuck a bucket to my ceiling in hopes of postponing the inevitable burning down my house in a fit of rage after one too many drops of water interrupted my sleep. So this is all just a sign that I’m a complete idiot.


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BMB: I’m Tired Okay

30 Saturday Jul 2022

Posted by crashdlanding in BMB, Non-Fiction

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

broke, crash landing, crashdlanding, financial planning, it jiggle jiggles, money, my money don't fold, non-fiction, website ownership

Day: 30 In Which I Run the Numbers

This Exhausting but I Still Enjoy it

This is the next to last day of Birthday Month Blogs, and you all will be glad to see less of me, I’m sure. Tomorrow is going to be a rundown of the month, including “was it worth it”.

But today is going to be “How can I Afford keep doing this?”

How can I afford to keep doing this?

By “this” I don’t mean posting every day. Nooooo. By “this” I mean keeping the site/blog/etc. Like, financially. In a previous post I mentioned how in February 2023, my 1-year subscription with the site will be up. And how, at the time, I didn’t spend much time here, despite the fact that I enjoy being here. It just wasn’t a cost-effective option for me.

However, one of the things I’ve learned is that I would really and truly miss it if I let it go. So, there’s a plan. Sort of.

The Plan

I have about five months until I have to pay the bill. The bill totals $186.

Here’s what that covers:

  • Domain Name: $18
  • Premium $96
  • G Suite $72

Now, $186 is a lot of money for someone who is perpetually broke. Like, bills paid but still a little bit of struggle broke. But if you divide that up by five months that’s 37.42. Round that up as I’m wont to do, that’s $40 a month. That would be about $20 a paycheck. Now, if I wanted to upgrade to the Business plan, which is required for monetization, then that’s, well, a lot more money. Basically, double I’d have to save. Still, I could manage at least one plan.

Fun fact I recently discovered that I was over a month in advance on my truck payment. That’s right, I didn’t necessarily need to send out the money I had budgeted to pay my payment. And I could use that money on what I needed (like lunch to eat at work, and little things for my kid) and still be able to pay my bills, and my truck payment closer to the actual due date.

I’d been paying this thing early because one time, my second or third payment, got lost in the mail, and in order to avoid a late fee, I had to pay it online via CHECK, and they charged me an extra $25 to pay it online. That is a whole lot of nonsense. I also despise my loan company. But just like family, we don’t get to choose them, if we go to a janky dealership at the bottom of a hill to buy a truck you saw on a whim and end up getting a different truck entirely.

Okay, we seemed to have strayed from the point.

The point is that I am going to attempt to save money to keep this nonsense going. I am also going to contact WordPress and say, “Hey, my dudes. This domain name is free with purchase of a plan, right? Lemme get that discount friend.”

I’m sorry that was unnecessary to the storyline. I’m just really sleepy. Don’t you love this chaos?


This is just a joke, do not take me seriously I am just throwing in nonsense that is available on this website okay. But if you WANT to donate to the “Save the Site” fund…

IM KIDDING SHEESH

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Make a one-time donation

Make a monthly donation

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Choose an amount

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Save the Site Fund is a proud sponsor of Crystal’s Nonsense. Please disregard.

Save the Site Fund is a proud sponsor of Crystal’s Nonsense. Please disregard.

Save the Site Fund is a proud sponsor of Crystal’s Nonsense. Please disregard.

DonateDonate monthlyDonate yearly

I promise, aside from the not-really-begging for donations, this is what I’m like in real life. Chaos. Chaotic Neutral? Chaotic Good? Is there a test for that? I’m sure there’s some kind of test I need to take.


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Things I’ve always wanted to do

13 Thursday Jun 2019

Posted by crashdlanding in Books, Non-Fiction, Truth, Unfinished Business

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

big ideas very little follow through, broke, bucket list, crystals crazy schemes, Dreams, if wishes were horses, money wasters, non-fiction

Almost exactly a year ago today I bought a ukulele on Amazon. I can probably play one cord. If I look it up on the internet.

The Uke is just one of the many examples of things I wanted to do (learn to play an instrument) that I’ll never do. SO HERE’S A LIST (in no particular order). Several I have attempted and even spent money on. Never succeeded.

  1. Learn to play an instrument – UKE
  2. Learn another language (I tried Irish, Spanish, and Sign) – I’ve bought CDs and books.
  3. Relearn to ride a bike (I’m told I know how but I can never seem to pull it back out) – Bought a bike, tried once. Was afraid of falling. Sold the bike three years later.
  4. Learn to make homemade biscuits – bought a cookbook (by one of my mom’s favorite tv personalities because of that and the biscuit recipe), a set of biscuit cutters, flour and buttermilk. Forgot.
  5. I’ve always wanted to be a good singer. I’ll NEVER spend money on that. My child likes my “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” just fine.
  6. I’ve always wanted to be a private detective. I have googled it, several years ago. It’s very expensive. I also didn’t drive at the time so I would have felt weird asking my husband for rides to stakeouts!
  7. FLIP HOUSES. Gotta have money to make money on that one. Ironically the cookbook person from number 4 used to do houses on TV.
  8. Wedding plan. I love weddings. This one started when I thought I’d never get married. Still love weddings.
  9. Tutor. I bought a book for this one. Had the idea to start my own tutoring business. Thought my education degree would be a good selling point. I worked for a tutoring company for a bit. It was a second job.
  10. Earn a living from writing. Ha. Ha ha ha. HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAAA!!!

-c

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