And I honestly wouldn’t have known had we not taken my child to the doctor.

I Wish It’d Been Longer

Two days ago, Wednesday, one of my days off of my day job, The Kid woke up sounding mildly stuffy and needing to clear her throat here and there. This isn’t always unusual, as she has allergy issues.

I myself have been sick for what feels like four straight weeks now. My symptoms have included what mostly just feels like my typical head cold. Then one morning a week ago or so, I woke up with a sore throat I couldn’t shake.

Now, I’ve tried extremely hard to not give whatever crud I had to my child’s. But when the sore throat rolled up, I assumed it was strep and that I had to be super serious.

But that morning she was stuffy and hoarse, she had NTI day for school. For the uninitiated that’s “Non-Traditional Day” for when in-person is cancelled. Like for weather. And during that, she asked for a blanket.

She NEVER asks for a blanket. When it was over she took said blanket and crawled back in bed. She spent hours there watching YouTube. And this child who prefers to live in her underpants, did not remove even her socks.

So, I messaged her dad and mentioned this. Initially I was going to give it a day. I’d felt like garbage and didn’t want to leave the house. But when I realized she might feel cold because of a fever, I decided we needed to get her in.

They symptoms we have the doctor office here vague. Slight fever, runny nose, clearing her throat and coughing. And she was lethargic. So they asked if we wanted to do a covid test. Just in case.

It was easier than I thought it’d be—none of the three of us had been tested—and it only took a second. But she has some anxiety issues, so it was stressful.

Please note: my husband and I have both been vaccinated. I had Moderna, and he had Johnson & Johnson. We are still nervous about the vaccine for our less that ten year old. I don’t think I’m on the fence anymore.

But in less that ten minutes they were back in the room confirming that she had covid. Which meant that I probably gave it to her, as I’d been sick for a while. And her dad had just started developing symptoms.

COVID-19

Or “Name Brand” Crud(TM)

Luckily, none of us have had any issues breathing. The Hubs does have asthma and allergy issues, which are under control with medication. The kid takes an OTC allergy med.

I tested positive later that evening. The hubby hasn’t taken a test yet but, I mean, duh. We’ve been quarantined since that (Wednesday) evening, and I only get five days of leave (despite the health department telling us to quarantine for seven).

So far, out of the three of us, The Kid seems to be feeling the best. She had the fever, stuffy/runny nose, and cough. She hasn’t complained of any other issues. The fever was done with her that night, and wanted to play made-up games (tiny boxing?!) with me just a few hours ago.

The Hubs seems to be stuffy with a cough. He hasn’t mentioned any other symptoms as of yet. Headache I think.

Me? Oh I still feel like I’ve been run over by a truck. Have since the first week of January. But I feel like the truck is slightly smaller today. My throat is less sore than it was, but it usually worsens at night (I’m about to go to bed). Still coughing and my ears hurt and my head hurts if I’m not careful. Oh and I’m dizzy.

The Issue

If my child hadn’t gotten sick, that tiny change in normalcy for her, I wouldn’t have assumed I had covid. I wouldn’t have gotten tested. I assumed I had a persistent head cold/sinus infection/strep. Usually when I get sick, really sick, not just allergies, I stay sick until my body decides, “okay fine you’ve suffered enough”.

Is it because I’m too lazy to see a doctor? Probably.

Is it because I have anxiety about going places I don’t usually go? Probably.

Is it because I think: “I’ll be fine eventually”? Probably.

Is it because I am a woman and like all the women before me I inherently believe that I’ve got too much to do to give in to being sick and I’ll just have to work through it? More than likely.

My mother had four children. All born within four years. She didn’t take a lot of time out for herself, even when she was sick. She waiting until her children were grown to take care of herself and by then it was too late to turn her health around in a positive way.

If I hadn’t taken the time to listen to my kid and see that yes she was sick, I would have went right back to work the next day, taking all manner of over-the-counter meds for cold and flu (and that ten month old bottle of antibiotics my husband hadn’t touched last April). I would have also bought all kinds of OTC meds for her (thank BOB she doesn’t mind the Sudafed liquid the doctor recommended).

Doesn’t Mean I Don’t Feel Terrible

I brought covid into my home. I gave it to my child. I gave it to my husband. I was afraid for a moment I gave it to my sister and her family. They all tested negative this time (they had it in August, I happily executed multiple socially distanced “Operation Dumbo Drop” missions to their driveway for supplies).

All I can do at this stage is be thankful that my child, who is a sturdy, strong soul, hasn’t had any worse symptoms. She has gotten to sleep in my bed two nights (after about forty in her own), so she’s definitely not complaining.

The Hubs, well, he hasn’t complained much yet. He knew I’d been feeling like “hot stinking garbage” for a while, so I think he doesn’t want to rain on my pity party. But we check in on each other but make The Kid our priority.

Thank you

To all those people who have checked up on us since learning we were infected, offered to do a porch drop off (we don’t need anything. I just want Pepsi and peanut m&ms). And just generally wanted to make sure The Kid was okay (she’s number one). We appreciate all the kindness.

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Thanks for reading!

-c