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Tag Archives: nonfiction

Story Time: Why I Wanted to Become a Writer

15 Thursday Dec 2022

Posted by crashdlanding in Non-Fiction, Story Time

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about me, champion, cheerleader, crash landing, crashdlanding, Dreams, mom, non-fiction, nonfiction, Story Time, tear drops frozen in time, why i wanted to be a writer, writing, young author, youth aithor, youth author

To be frank, the why can be summed up with one word, and that one word is a who. Mom.

You see, my mother was one of those mom’s who encouraged, to the fullest extent of the law, her children, if she thought her children could make something of themselves. And even if she didn’t really think they could make a life of it, but if it made them happy. And I truly believe it made her happy to encourage us and cheer us on, and root for us.

Take my brother, for example. My brother, the second oldest in the family and the second son, was a football player. He was, I believe, on the first football team at our elementary school. Now, when my biography gets written in 115 years, don’t quote me. But that’s how I remember it. Both brothers played basketball for a minute, but Second really took to football like no body’s business.

And even though she knew that he could get seriously injured doing it, and she knew that if he did she couldn’t legally race onto the field and pummel the ever-loving nonsense out of the boy who dared to tackle her player, she thoroughly enjoyed cheering him and the rest of the team on from the bleachers. This did have a lot to do with the fact that she made friends with the other moms, but that’s not what we’re talking about here.

She loved to cheer her children on. When the Oldest was the first to graduate high school, she was thrilled. Anytime we did anything good, she was happy for us, and encouraged us.

She is also the reason why I stuck with the education major in college. Sophomore year I wanted to change my major to creative writing. I also had a point where I wanted to drop out, take a few semesters off, and join the circus get a job. But that’s not what we’re discussing here either.

“Tear Drops Frozen In Time”

When I was in elementary school, I’m not sure what grade (it was a LONG time ago) I wrote a story. “Duh, Crystal” is what you are probably thinking as you roll your eyes and consider scrolling on. But if you stick with me, I will get to the point. I’m not sure this was my first ever story. I’m not even sure how much I wrote. But I can tell you what it was about and how it began. It was written in a notebook, not spiral bound, and the loose sheets were tucked into a folder with my school’s mascot on them.

Now, in that grade, in my state, we did writing portfolios as an end-of-year assessment of our knowledge. These portfolios usually included various types of writing, including fiction pieces. That year, I remember a teacher, who wasn’t usually at our school, there helping us with those writing portfolios. I remember spending a lot of time in what passed as a computer lab in a rural Kentucky elementary school in the early 90s and that woman being there.

It was around this time that I wrote “Tear Drops”. And I remember either myself or Mom mentioning that I should take my story to school and let that teacher read it. Now keep in mind the story was not finished, and had it been, it would have been a LONG one. Because I have always been long winded.

Thinking about the story now, I am remembering other stories I wrote, and wishing I’d kept copies of all of them.

Also, honey, I asked for a frickin’ TYPEWRITER for Christmas one year. Second (the brother) kept trying to throw me off the scent when I guess that the biggish box under the tree was my typewriter. Man, I miss that clickity clack sometimes.

Back to the point. My mom was my biggest fan, always. And she was the first and for a long time only person I nervously handed my stories over to for them to be read. And when she read that one, she said she loved it and it would be a great story.

And, as I said, I can’t remember whose idea it was for me to take that story to school and share with this woman I did not really know, who I assume I thought was a bigwig when it came to writing. Because I shared it with her and she too seemed to love the story. And she did something that was probably bad for me in the long run. She told me that she knew some people in publishing and said that she would tell them about my story.

You do not, under any circumstances tell a child, especially one who longs for acceptance and praise, that you’re going to do something that will make them dream. Because that kid, me, will take that thing and make it HER ENTIRE PERSONALITY FOR THE REST OF HER LIFE.

I let a stranger make me believe I was going to be a published author as a child.

But listen, dear readers, because I am not the only one who was offended when that mystery lady failed to make me a famous author before puberty. Because who do you think was the first person who I ran right home to and told about this silly lady in the computer room who is gonna talk to her book friends?

Yup. Da Momma.

Eventually, portfolio writing season came to an end and that lady disappeared from my school like my paycheck after the bills are paid. I never saw her again, until one fateful evening, where we were, ironically, in line at waiting to pay our way in to a high school football game (where my brother was playing, we only went when he was a player). I’m not sure how much time had passed between the two meetings, but I’m not lying when I say my mother wanted to ask her about it.

I remember telling her that the woman probably wouldn’t even remember all that, and to forget about it.

Unfortunately

It was sometime later when it came to pass that the story in question, “Tear Drops Frozen in Time” went missing. It went missing because it got placed into storage that ended up probably being put in long term storage (literally a crawl space in a decrepit building behind our house). It was placed there because I should have been paying more attention to what was going where.

Sadly, though, my mom blamed herself for it going missing, and its likely eventual burning in a trash pile later on. I don’t care what I told her and how many times I tried to tell her not to worry about it, but she blamed herself for it for years. And if I could have asked her about it on her death bed, I’m sure she would have still blamed herself, even decades later.

In conclusion, it is her fault. Her fault not for the story going missing, but for that story setting me on this pointless uphill path of wanting to be a writer. I blame her for that, and that is all, when it comes to the story. Her faith and hope and absolute enthusiasm that we could do great things. And you know, I wouldn’t change a thing.

Except that story going missing. I would fix that bit.

Bonus Content: “Tear Drops” A Synopsis.

Like I said, it has been multiple decades, since I wrote the story, but I can give you the gist of what it was about. The story was centered those glass teardrop shaped ornaments that usually hang off chandeliers and lamps. I don’t know for sure where I got it, but I know where I left it and that’s yet another story for another time. Okay, it’s not that big a story, when I was young and I hyperfused on one thing I would tend to pack that thing around with me wherever I went. This time, I took the glass tear drop to my uncle’s house for the weekend. All of us kids went, and they had two little girls younger than us. We were playing in an old van and I had it wrapped up in a tissue or handkerchief and I tucked it in the cubby in the door and forgot it there. Never went back to that house either, because they moved.

Any who, “Tear Drops Frozen in Time” was going to be about an adopted girl who, one day on her way home from school, obviously while carrying around a teardrop shaped crystal, sees the light from the sun change. Shimmering lights (like what you’d see when sun comes through crystals, like a prism, or rainbows are all over the ground when monsters (?) like she’s never seen before, come out of the light and kidnap her.

But also, in another world, there are two women who look a great deal alike (twins?). Except one is clearly evil and has the other good woman locked up. There’s this great sphere with shapes in it. Some of the spaces are empty and some are not. One space is teardrop shaped. These women, who are sisters it turns out, argue.

The evil woman wants to capture this girl because she has the teardrop and the good one, who wants out to stop her evil sister, is SHOCKER the girl’s MOTHER! The girl is actually from this other world and the teardrops are powerful crystals that can do many things, including but not limited to traveling between worlds. The mother sent the girl to the mortal world/our world/ boring old frumpy earth to protect her and the teardrop she carries everywhere was a gift to help protect her.

And that’s all I’ve got for you, my dudes.


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Hi, Robin!

11 Saturday Jun 2022

Posted by crashdlanding in Make Someone Smile, Mental Health, Non-Fiction

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back pain, crash landing, crashdlanding, illness, little things, Make Someone Smile, Mental Health, non-fiction, nonfiction

This post is about how sometimes we do things to make other people smile, because it makes us feel good.

My own mom died four years ago. I miss her terribly and I think of her constantly. In my dreams she’s almost always alive. Sometimes she’s sick. Sometimes she happy. Once in a while she’s mad at me.

I work with a girl named Abby. She’s a good kid. She friendly and fun to talk too. Abby doesn’t drive so her mom brings her too and from work, and has been for ages.

Abby’s mom’s name is Robin. Robin reminds me of my mom. She’s friendly and always seems bright when I see her.

Turns out she has been parking behind me for ages. Abby and I work the same shift, so we get off around the same time. Nine times out of ten, I’m late, but once in a while I see the both as I’m leaving work.

It quickly became a silly inside joke that Robin always parks behind me if the space is open. So I told Abby one day, “You know what? I’m gonna use my Cricut, and I’m gonna make a sticker for the back of my truck that says, ‘Hi, Robin!’“

Abby said she’s get a kick out of it. I don’t know if Abby thought I’d actually do it.

But I did. I cut the sticker about a week ago, when I was making my own earring cards. I already had the Cricut out so I figured I’d do it.

I remembered to put it on yesterday. Abby didn’t work yesterday. I saw her today.

“Abby, let me show you something.” I showed her the sticker on the truck. She laughed and said her mom would love it (Robin likes frogs). I told her to be sure to let me know her reaction.

This evening, I was talking to my nephews, who showed up at my work, and Abby walked up. Apparently, she had something to show me.

Robin and videoed herself reacting to the sticker. The video was basically of the back of my truck and the sticker, with her giggling and gleeful in the background. I think all three of us were ecstatic over the whole thing.

Of course, some random stranger is gonna wonder, “why in the world?!” But it’ll be our inside joke.

Here’s the kicker.

Yesterday, I gave my mind permission to dwell intrusively on my past mistakes and failures. The combination of that and having been sick for a week or more, and back issues for three weeks, I was most definitely in a bad place.

I was to the point where I was being short with The Kid, and looking back, even hours later after she’d gone to bed I felt terrible about it.

To be honest I just wanted nothing more than to crawl in a cave and never come out. That way all the things that trigger me wouldn’t be a factor.

But then, the next day, I made someone happy. I made someone smile. I did that. I can do something, and that something, is make someone smile. It’s a little thing, yes. But it’s something, and despite still being sick (I have medicine now), I made my entire evening.

So, go out. Make someone smile. I bet you’ll feel good too.


Thanks for reading.

-c

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Over the last few days I’ve been in a rough place.

08 Wednesday Jun 2022

Posted by crashdlanding in Non-Fiction

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crash landing, crashdlanding, emotional health, health, Mental Health, non-fiction, nonfiction

Well, more like months but probably years?

Lately though, between a combination of back issues, illness, and other factors, I have emotionally and mentally not been in the best place. Not to mention that I did something I told myself I wouldn’t do again.

For anyone concerned that last thing has nothing to do with physically hurting myself or harming anyone else in any way. It’s just a thing that causes me dismay that I promised myself I would avoid.

Side note/Life Hack: if you can’t get at a good angle to see under something use your video feature with flash on to look. I found my off brand mucinex.

Overthinking things and letting my mind hope and wonder, but also knowing that I’m probably not strong enough to fight against all the things coming at me at once, makes for a harsh internal climate.

And you DO NOT want to know how many times in the last three weeks I’ve wanted to cut off all my hair. Myself. We’re it not for my young child I would be intentionally bald. She likes my hair.

In the last three weeks my back has gone out about three times (really it’s just been the once but it’ll feel better then get bad again). I’ve coughed so much my head hurts and my chest hurts, not to mention the coughing until I gag.

Also and this is slightly more funny than the rest of it, my voice is kinda fine but kinda not, to the extent that my child asked me at one point to stop singing to the music we were listening too, because—and I quote, “it sounds bad.”

I personally found it absolutely hilarious that when I hit the high notes my voice was basically nonexistent. But also the force required to speak is exhausting.

Over the last few days I’ve consumed my weight in ibuprofen and cough medicine. Multiple people at work have told me I smell like a cough drop so at this point it’s probably coming out in my sweat.

But I did finally finish a short story related to the #PretendFantasyNovel. It’s currently up but password protected until the group members have had a chance to read it.

It might end up being available to all in a week. Or I might keep it just between us.

Anyway the melatonin is taking over and I’m gonna let it. Gonna go dream about millipedes on my pillow. Goodnight


Thanks for reading!

-c

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Welcome

23 Saturday Apr 2022

Posted by crashdlanding in Non-Fiction, Truth

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Black friday a zombie story, crash landing, crashdlanding, followers, introduction, life, likes, non-fiction, nonfiction, welcome, writing

Over the last few days I’ve gotten several likes and views and maybe one or two followers. Not that it makes me a famous blogger yet. But as it’s been a while since my last post, I thought I’d reintroduce myself.

Hi, my name is Crystal. Welcome to my website/blog. Where I share the most random collection or posts and stories you may ever come across.

Here I will talk about my mom, who passed four years ago. Family related things, though I’ll never name anyone. Other general life related topics. I often briefly discuss changing my life and going in new journeys.

I like to do a “series” called “You Don’t Need…” where I pretend I’m a self-improvement/advice blogger and talk about things that the would tells you you need but might not be accurate.

I also like to say I’m a writer of fiction. I’ve written and self published a few books, currently available on Amazon. The most popular of which is “Black Friday: A Zombie Story. It was written for my friends and coworkers at the time and one reviewer pointed out that that fact made it less good?

One thing I do a lot of here that I feel I should warn you about is I Lie.

I make promises I never keep. I have good intentions, but little follow through.

The only excuse I can give you right now is that I am exhausted about 97% of the time. I work a full time job, I am a mom of an under 10 Kid with ADHD. I’ve been suffering from excruciating foot pain. And as someone who works on their feet for a living, that’s not good. After spending 8+ hours a day on my feet, I come home and only wish to rest. I can’t usually get past short form videos on my phone to think about doing anything else.

I tell myself I’m gonna try harder, because I would love for this to be come a career. But I try to live in reality to an extent and I know that it’s unlikely.

So, if I have any new followers, welcome. You might see me once in a blue moon, but know it’s not because I don’t wanna be here. Ya girl is just tired. Lol


Thanks for Reading

-c

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Right Wing? Left Wing? CHICKEN WINGS!

20 Friday Jan 2017

Posted by crashdlanding in Politics, Rant, religion, Uncategorized

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2017, fear, hate, inagruation, nonfiction, Politics, president

I am not a political person, though I am a registered democrat. As a 32 year old, I registered this year. I did not vote in any election. This is why I don’t feel I have a place in the discussion of the controversial new president. While I am not a Trump supporter (I wasn’t a Hillary supporter either) I do feel that it is in the best interest of this country, the very same in which I am raising my child, to at least give him a chance and hope that he does in fact do good things. 

I also firmly believe that PEACEFUL protests are a person’s right. Violence is not, nor will it ever be the answer. But, none of these things are going to make a difference. Love him or hate him, Donald Trump in your president (if you live in these United States). 

I am also not a religious person. I’ve had my own difficulties and confusion over religion and God, I have my very own set of beliefs and doubts. But I do know that God says love each other, be kind to each other. 

This hate is one of the very reasons people dislike Trump. Yet, here people are spouting hate and anger towards him. People who say they are Christians and follow the word of God and the bible and go to church. Is this what God wants? I really don’t know. Tell me!

If hate and violence are what we reduce ourselves to, what we allow ourselves to give in too, isn’t that just the same as Trump’s hate? Aren’t you the same as him?

When Dondald Trump was elected president I feared for this nation, this world, and it’s people. But it’s starting to look like we are bringing ourselves down before he can adjust his office chair to suit his preferences. 

–

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